Blogtoberfest: Waiter Lust

Tonight I went to dinner. I was out at fine dining restaurant. [I got my baby-back, baby-back, baby-back ribs...] I felt like the queen I should feel like.  I walked in the door and they led me to a table that they must have set aside in case I walked in.  The table was a perfect fit for my entourage (cough…my family).

I sat down and a sweet young waiter came to the table and asked me if I wanted to order drinks.  This is when I knew he was in love with me. I ordered my diet coke and Jack Daniels.  Then he handed me extra napkins.  He nodded his head, which was a sign that he wanted me.

 Blogtoberfest: Waiter Lust

Would you like something to drink Foxy Becca?

I felt sorry for the rest of my entourage. The sexual chemistry was out of control. Many times throughout the meal he kept asking if I wanted a refill on my water.  He would make eye contact with me and smile every time he would refill my beverage.  Once he asked me if I wanted more Jack and Coke.

His blooming love concerned me.  I didn’t want him to feel mislead as I ordered fajitas and ate them.  I knew he was watching me take each bite and thinking of me biting into him.  That dirty waiter.

2625030960 fbff40ec4b Blogtoberfest: Waiter LustThen at the end of our meal he asked me if I wanted dessert.  We all know what that means.  I told him no thank you.  He winked and said, can I get you anything else?  I blushed and said no thanks. He then drew a smile on my check…he totally wanted to bang me in the back.

This is what it is like to be Becca, lady of Lady or Not…Here I Come. Sigh.  I can’t go anywhere without people hitting on me.  Sigh. It sucks. Oh the whore…I mean the horror!

spookybannercopy 584x2691 Blogtoberfest: Waiter Lust



Lady or Not…Here I Come!


Blogtoberfest: Waiter Lust — 105 Comments

  1. It must have been really hard, I mean it must have
    been really difficult for him wanting you throughout
    the meal and licking his lips at any opportunities of
    a wild, wicked and most delicious dessert ;) :) lol

    Becca you get worse, but in a nice way ;)

    Andro xxx

  2. I get that from my waitresses when i go out.
    Wow, here we are, you and I, two great minds, I mean bodies, no make that sexual beings, finding so many of the opposite sex wanting and desiring us over square tables and rectangular booths.
    Sort of makes sex a meal in itself.

    Thanks for the fun and something I can relate to.

  3. When I was a shirtless waiter, I wasn’t as successful because my chest hairs shed into the dishes I carried to the tables. I refused to shave my chest and that was that….I became a meter reader and met bored..frustrated housewives that way. :-)

  4. You weren’t kidding! You really are having to fight guys off. Have you thought about pepper spray? Maybe a baseball bat? I would say you didn’t give him a big enough tip for the services BUT guys are delusional sometime and a bigger tip may have appeared to be a sign of your undying love. Awesome post.

  5. This is hysterical! (prolly in the old sense of the word, lol) Rebecca, your wit is as sharp as it gets. Really a unique and irreverent voice, I love the fantastic trip to dinner. And yes, clearly, that dirty birdie wanted you bad! :)

  6. Lmao! This was hilar! Loved it! I only ever get hit on by bar tenders. This of course after I’ve tipped them ridiculously. Smh. Lucky to be you! Nonetheless loved the post, will definitely be following.

  7. Oh Becca…I feel your pain. That is always happening to ME to. Once, the waiter even PLACED the napkin in my LAP!!! You KNOW what THAT means Becca… He was trying to grab a quick peek at my Netherlands and my Boobs that were hanging out. What we sex goddesses have to GO through just to have a meal huh!!!

    Until Later…

  8. It’s hard being so fine. Seeing as I am royalty I often get hit on when I am out and about. Heavy lies the crown. You made me laugh. Thank you!

  9. I have the same problem at restuarants. Young waitresses are always asking if they can “sweeten my tea.”

    Thanks for visiting my blog. I look forward to reading more from you.

  10. Nice, I even felt the tension; not bad for a whore…I mean, a Horror story gone good. ;)

    Love your sense of humor and set-up…I like’em Gothic and deliberate.

    Hope your All Saints brings you what you want…or what you need – those tricksey conversations with our beloved departed can be a Bitch.

    Take care…

  11. Oh, that poor waiter. You just know he spent the rest of the day in agony, pining over the distant beauty that spurned him, even though he offered to refill her water and everything! Becca, you cruel cruel woman. ;)

  12. Okay, now I’m really worried. One of the door Nazis at Costco always draws a smiley face on my receipt as I’m leaving. So this means he wants to . . . ?

Oh you know you want to give verbal ejaculation a try. Spit it out!